Wednesday, November 19, 2014

And the snark queen herself...(btw, I hate the word snark too)

I just haven't found a better one...

Acorns in the wind

Instead of Buckshot...just another title for random thoughts.
Also, acorns don't blow in the wind, so laugh now, as it is supposed to be funny!
{I am laughing at myownself.}

**Annoying linguistic trend of the season:  People leading every thought or paragraph with "so".
This is quickly going to be the next, "like".  Find another transition word, please!  "so" has an official grammatical be the transition of your every thought is not it.
This trend started on N.P.R.--but now even the PTA moms at my very rural school are doing is SUPER annoying--no matter who is using it.
*  Winter sucks!  All of a sudden all I wanna do is hide out!
Today at work I had to wear a damned tobogan on my head and I can't take it off b/c my office is cold and I have to go out every 30 minutes might as well stay warm, right?  ugh...
**why in the HELL?? is everyone all of a sudden taking professional pictures of everything they do?? the pictures are cute--but is everygoddamnthing that fucking special??--(I know there is a lot of emphasis there, but my winter bad mood has officially kicked in (maybe I should call the local professional photographer to foto me on my dirty ass couch, drinking beer in my tobogan with my mean-ass grimmace on my face)--I mean revealing the gender of your fetus??--all of your pregnancy fotos--by a professional photog??? baby's first boogar...G.D. Enough is one needs to do all of this...too much celebrating already..okay??  shit! PS if you photograph the conception, that is officially called Porno if you post it of F@c3b00k.  Okay? Okay.
newsflash--they are gonnaendupinaboxin a closet--you don't have enough walls for all that shit!
Just fyi in case you want to know that shit ahead of time --also, we are not all supermodels, nor are we all professional photographers, so don't quit your day job--or if you just don't have one, maybe you should join the rest of us and be miserable as f*c! every morning and "haul your ass down to vascolindas and hang drywall at the new mcdonald's" (thank you OfficeSpace for all my favorite work-related quotes)--or turn in some t.p.a. reports..etc.
Those are my three thoughts for today...
three acorns!
that is all..

Sunday, November 9, 2014

When you're the runner-up

You only get a medal.
You. only. get. a. medal.

AND when you are seven, eight, or nine; apparently the trophy is the only thing that matters.
The glory of being champion is only trumped by the plastic, gold-painted statue, which must be had!
The win is not the thing.
The trophy is the thing.

Yesterday our team was the runner-up.
All day long, leading up to the play-off game, there were tales of trophies past.
They had spinny things...
They were blue.
They were tall.
The little boys were all so excited and full of confidence that this trophy would be theirs.

Alas, it was not to be!
NOPE.  The other team from our town beat us!--a tough blow, to be honest--
BUT--at the end of it all Victor told us, that it would have been alright if the runner-up team would have gotten a trophy!--Darn it!
Not, if we would have won.
Sino, if we would have been awarded a trophy!

When we were little they were still made of metal I think.
Nowadays they, like most other things, are made of plastic.
No.  Matter.  Trophy is trophy.

P.S.  I have never been awarded a trophy for anything! 
I never played all this stuff when I was little.
So, no trophies.  Oh, and I really think they should give kids who make all A's trophies.
I did do that!

Saturday, November 1, 2014

All the way from Watsonville California....

A cute little bug, who was tucked away inside my raspberry this morning.
I bet that was a crazy journey!
At first glance, it appeared that he might be dead.
BUT, when I broke the raspberry open, he began to move.
Currently he resides in Beaufort County NC, and the raspberry has been consumed.