Friday, April 3, 2009

beam me up, scotty

OK...I have no idea where this saying comes from, but I know it means--please get me the hell out of here quickly.
ZAP!
This afternoon I was enjoying some sunshine, playing with my children in the yard--with and without Andy just going in and out of the house.
E. was riding her bike with our neighbor, Tristen.
Victor was pushing the stoller around.
Peace.
Then I heard it...
"Heeyyyyyy Susan!"
It was the neighbor, Sugie (like sugar without ar, and with ie), I have no idea how to spell this.
Oh, shit, I thought to myself, there goes my peace.
Sugie is sick, she has hepatitis, she is always ailing she takes all kinds of pills, they never have any money...the list goes on.
Tristen was born when she was old...so she does not play with Tristen, we do--WHICH IS FINE. :)
BUT--I have no desire to "play" with Sugie.
Is this mean, maybe.
BUT picture this scenario, that I know you have all experienced.
The endless fuc--da--(not gonna cuss) conversation with a person who is oblivious to the conversation partner, rhythm, length.
She tells stories, with whole other stories embedded into endless sentences...that have no point.
EVery time I am talked at by Sugie, I feel like someone is choking me.
How long did the torture last this time? about 45 minutes.
I just knew Andy was going to rescue me,you know the ole,"susan come here I need you!"
But no...she just kept talking ...the pins in her ankles, last dec. 24th --new year's eve..her brother killing himself...her uncle killing himself...her SEX LIFE!! yep, she even went THERE!
Finally, "ring, ring, ring" -I ran my big old tail over to the table to get the phone, all the while hollering, "okay sugie, it was good to talk to ya, I've gotta get this phone!!"
I never even looked back.
While I was fixing supper I thought of the perfect thing to say from now on, "I've got water boiling on the stove Sugie, Ihave to go in now."
I will, hopefully, never get sugied on a Friday afternoon again..
Whew.

I have also already vented this to 1. my mama (who wason the phone) 2. to Andy 3. Shannon, you are next! :)

2 comments:

Moore, Moore, Moore! said...

I HATE BEING "Sugied"...this happens to me all the time at school in the workroom...I am in there trying to make copies, get stuff done, etc...And someone comes in who wants to tell me this long drawn out story that I could care less about...and they never ask about me, my life, kids, etc...I am going to start calling this "Sugied"!!! Love ya!
Hope ya'll have a great weekend!

Bethany said...

That is too funny - unsolicited sex life stories are THE worst. And always told by people that are... ummm... not sexy?! So you got sugied :) definitely a new word we will be throwing around... :)