Saturday, May 22, 2010

Oh No!

So there is this house that is beside Andy's mom and dad's house that is old.
Forever and ever there were just always "wierd" people over there. There was always an old man over there. Sometimes there were some renters. Then as of about six years ago there was his daughter and her girlfriend, one of whom was {really really into collecting clowns -even had a house in the yard for them} yeah. The house was over grown. Dilapitaded. The neighbors had yip yip dogs, and they were {wierd}.
Old man died.
Daughter sold house.
People from "Raleigh" (which usually means from actually somewhere else) bought the house.
It is their summer vacation spot/destination for when the man retires.
The point of this is coming.
But, Since the "Raleigh people" bought this house we have looked in the windows
admired their changes etc.
Today I got the chance to meet Mrs. Raliegh People, Raleighita and Raleighito...and...

Ughh...y'all

There goes my peaceful little shady beach for my children who play really well together and leave me alone to read...There it goes (insert sound of toilet flushing here).
The little girl...OBNOXIOUS. She whines with a Yankee accent Constantly and she cannot say the /r/ sound (she sounds like Calliou's twin sister). In the first five minutes I was out on the beach I had enough of her to last the entire summer.
Her mother, well this is what I learned about her in about 15 minutes:
her daddy is an oil man
her daddy has a ranch in tx.
her daddy's ranch is only 200 acres
her daddy is a chemical engineer
her daddy can weld fences for cattle
she was infertile
she almost died giving birth to jr.-who was conceived via
in vitro fertilization
the daughter was adopted
the son has a.d.d.
they want their children to have a taste of country life
that is why they bought the house
--
oh, and she commits the ultimate faux pax at the drop of a hat
SHE LEAVES HER KIDS WITH PEOPLE WHO DO NOT OFFER BABYSITTING SERVICE!!!
--
What she needs to know about me:
I do not like whiney children
I do not like ruffian bossy children who cannot say /r/s and talk like yankees
I do not like oil men from tx. who own ranches (hee hee)
I DO NOT BABYSIT OTHER PEOPLE'S CHILDREN UNLESS I OFFER!!!
SO SHE WILL HAVE TO TAKE HER LITTLE WONDERS BACK OVER TO HER PIECE OF HEAVEN WHEN SHE LEAVES.
--
"oh," she said, "I am off to get my microwave, Just send them home when y'all go in, and feel free to speak to her if you need to, she is a little ____" ( I cannot remember the euphemism for "brat" that she used.)

MY Response in my head, "Take your little brat back over there with you. I am not going to watch her...and you don't need to give a person permission to "speak" to your child when you leave them playing."

There goes the neighborhood! :)

1 comment:

Bethany said...

Oh No is right! Nooo! I know the house you're talking about... can't believe she left & told you to send the kids in! I am 100% w/ you - I do not watch kids unless I offer. We run into that now & then, being in a neighborhood, and I have had to put my foot down. One time the neighbor "let" -sent! 4 kids over - uninvited! I sent them right back. Good luck w/ that... surely you'll keep us {posted}...

Spot on!

Spot is our family's chihuahua.  He is what we call, "an evil dictator/stuffed animal come to life".  Sometimes, after he has ...